Archive for the category “personality assessment”

Sometimes I’m Proud

More often than not, if I were to say how I feel on any given day, it would be Sometimes I’m Overwhelmed or Sometimes I’m Filled with Self Doubt or Sometimes I Think I’m Super Fat.

Fortunately for me, the key word is “sometimes” — I don’t feel that way all the time or even often.  But every once in a while those nagging feelings of what I think I can’t do come to the surface and take hold like hungry ticks on a fat lap-dogs’ belly.

lifelineA few weeks ago I hoped that someone or something would throw me a lifesaver because I couldn’t breathe.  I am happy to say I found it bobbing up and down in the waters of my mind and I made it to dry land.  I do believe that writing this blog provides me with much-needed therapy.  I started this journey, not because I wanted to become a famous blogger, but because I felt it would motivate me and keep me from quitting.  That’s what it does.  Every post I write and every reply from one of my dear friends; every email I receive that someone new is “following me”, or “liked” my post is like a virtual hug that I feel here in my little “dorm room/office“.  I crave those hugs, I need them.  Sometimes I think I’m In over My Head but I know there are people reading this who believe without a doubt that I’m not; that “I got this”.

The good news is that I signed up for class again this semester! This is a 100% on-line class which fits in perfectly with my hectic life.  I’ve also taken a mental “chill pill'” when it comes to my new job in the new year.  I had to because I was quite literally  making myself sick with worry.  I am learning to say no to some things and how to say, I’m the boss and this is the way I want it to be done. Words I would never have thought I could say, never mind would feel the confidence to believe in after I say them.  But I do.  It’s empowering and it helps me get through the day and start to feel these small glimmers of, dare I say, — success (okay let’s just say, ‘not failures’).

Although its 22 degrees outside and a winter storm is blanketing my home like a scene from a snowpocalypse movie; technically its Spring in the world of academia.  So today its Spring for me too! This semester begins with a renewed sense of hope and a deep sense of gratitude for all of you who, whether you knew it or not, tossed me the life lines I needed.  I have to admit, I didn’t think I would be writing this message this way.  I thought it would be an explanation of why I had to take a short break, and filled with promises that I would return and not let myself down. But that’s not today’s message.  Today I’m still here, I’m still on this journey, and as I look back on the last few weeks, I have to say Sometimes I’m Proud Of Me.


When Doves Fly

Peaceful Dove

Peaceful Dove (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

During my hiatus from blogging, I had the opportunity to attend a work related conference held in Austin, Texas.  This four day event produced at least one item that I wanted to share with you.  Granted there were plenty of other situations that took place that would be entertaining to share, however, they would need to appear in a very different blog under an assumed name!

Now onto the lesson…

Prior to arriving at the conference, we were sent a personality profile quiz.  A series of 18 questions each of which gave two answer options, for example, question 1:

I am:

a). more open to getting to know people better and establishing new relationships, OR

b). more likely to control who I get involved with and how well I get to know them

On the opening day of the conference, we were given our results; based on the answers to the 18 questions we were either DOVES, OWLS, PEACOCKS or EAGLES – essentially we were all D.O.P.E.S.; as the acronym spells out!

Let me first say, this isn’t my first rodeo, as I have taken many other personality profiles. I’m a big fan of good on-line horoscopes, I’ve shelled out cash to the neighborhood psychic for a reading on my future and I even had a bonafide PHD in Astrology use my birthdate and the alignment of the stars to tell me who I really am.  Ironically, I consider myself pretty intune to “who I am”.  I feel very comfortable telling anyone who cares to know, what I do well and where my faults lie.  So why then am I still so fascinated by these profile assessments?  If I’m never surprised by what they say, why do I continue to get so much meaning out of them?  Perhaps I am hoping that someone else will see something better in me and convince me to do the same.

Back to the lesson…

the four personality types panned out as follows:

  • The peaceful DOVE. The dove is people-orientated, loyal, friendly, hard-working and a great team player but tends to avoid change, confrontation, risk-taking and assertiveness.
  • The wise OWL. The owl is logical, mathematically minded, methodical and sometimes seen as a perfectionist. The owl can be slow to make decisions and inflexible if rules and logic says otherwise. Owls are not big risk takers but love detail.
  • The showy PEACOCK. The peacock loves talking, being the center of attention, has passion/ enthusiasm and is happy/ optimistic. Peacocks can be accused of talking too much, and aren’t good with detail or time-control.
  • The bold EAGLE. Eagles are dominant, stimulated by challenge, decisive and direct. Eagles can be blunt/ stubborn, can lose sight of the big-picture and can be insensitive to other people’s needs. Eagles are natural achievers.

Anyone that knows me (and/or is able to infer from the not so cleverly disguised blog-title) knows where I fell into this mix; I’m all DOVE.

But here’s the kicker, the take-away from this session however, was not about understanding who you are but understanding the people around you.  The moderator used a great opening statement, which he adopted from best selling author, Tony Alessandra, and I will paraphrase:

Most of us try to live our lives following the Golden Rule…”do unto others as you would have them do unto you”; but what’s more powerful is to follow the Platinum Rule…“Do unto others as they would have you do unto them”.

In essence, if you are dealing with someone who is a Peacock then treat them the way Peacocks want to be treated.  If I’m a Dove and I’m following the Golden Rule that I grew up on, then I will end up treating the Peacocks in my life the way I enjoy being treated.  While that might not be a bad, thing, the chances that I will get that Peacock to do what I want, are slim to none because they won’t respond to the same stimuli that I do.  Peacocks want to be treated differently than Doves (and Owls, and Eagles, etc..).  If I want to make progress with a Peacock, I need to give them what they want, not what I want.  This, my friends, was truly inspired thinking for me.

I have no stake in this testing profile and anyone can do a google search of Doves, Owls, Peacocks and Eagles and a thousand hits will appear with links to hundreds of sites.  Throughout this blog, I embedded a few links, if you care to click onto them and see what I’m talking about.   I also found a youtube video, that’s a fairly decent summary of what I experienced.  Take it or leave it, but I can attest that in my work life, my school life, and my sad to report, still quite unfulfilled love life, when this Dove flew to Texas, she learned a pretty invaluable lesson that I could not help but share.

Happy Flying All!

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Kalia Kornegay

Freelance Journalist

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